Day 9

There has definitely been some time between posts, but I have been doing mostly good.

The weekend break was amazing. My son left friday evening, I went to practice, then me and Maeci attended the RCRD/Rt 66 April Fools party. That was interesting to say the least. But I think that is for a different blog. It was nice because neither of us had to worry about holding my son or making sure he was taken care of, but it was also sad seeing all the babies there and not having mine.

Then, I went horseback riding and to a girl scout dance saturday. That was a lot of fun. The ride was so therapeutic. My back had been hurting from derby, and the ride seemed to stretch it out like it needed. That dance was also great. I girled up and wore a dress, make-up, heels, shaved legs... it was a great feeling. Plus, getting the one on one time with Maeci was so much fun! We needed that! After the dance, Maeci stayed with a friend so mom could go spend some times with some ninjas. I couldn't waste my hot girl face! Lol!

So, I went to my best friend's house to hang out and play games. There was a pretty good little crowd there, and it felt great to hang out with no child related worries. Plus, did I mention I was in a dress?! We took lots of pics with a disposable camera at the dance, so as soon as they are developed, I can scan and post.

Sunday, I was more slow moving and missing my baby TONS!!! I tried to skip out on practice, but the sunday coach couldnt make it, so I went to run practice. I wasnt going to skate either. But I decided to try a few laps out to loosen and work my muscles. It was a good practice, and afterward, I called Troy. It took him a while to show up, but I finally got my baby back! It was so good to see him, and I could tell he was happy to see mommy and sister... especially sissy! They played rough house all night!!

I was cordial with his dad. Cold, but cordial. He came in with teething tablets like he was the hero of the day. He tried to hand them to me, but I looked at him and said, I already got some. He finally withdrew his hand and said, fine i'll just keep them. I was rude because I bought some the same day I took him to the doctor two weeks prior... this was the same week he ignored my calls and texts. Hmmm... (no shoulds or shouldnts.) I also gave him my house # because my cell will be shut of tomorrow. He started his auto message, "call me if yall need anything." But, I turned and gave a half ass wave along with my back before he could finish that unreliable, automatic statement.

It was hard. I miss him. I wanted to hug him and tell him thank you, but for what?

I'm not nice yet, but I also held my tongue from saying the hateful things on my mind and heart. I know that is God's grace. It will get better. I know that eventually, my icey heart will melt.